Missing Sarah
2005-11-12 / 10:06 a.m.
It is 10:06AM and only five people are online on MSN. Sarah T isn't one of them.
I always get so worried when I lose contact with her over periods of time. Some people may worry if someone hasn't been in contact for a week, for when Sarah doesn't come into contact after school at night, either by phone, text or MSN, I always worry. Like right now, the last time I spoke to her was yesterday hugging her goodbye at the bus stop, and I have texted her through-out last night but no response was given. It may make me sound clingy, but I just worry if she's okay. I don't worry that she isn't talking to me or feeble things like that, but I worry that,
"What if she gets hit by a car on the way to her nan's ... ?"
I always tell myself off when I have thoughts like these, I always run away with death. I would be looking at me and Sarah's polaroid picture on my wall, and think, what if that moment never comes back again?
Sarah is really precious to me. She is the closest person to me ever since my love has went away ... no, she was the closest to me back then too, just in a different way. She has been my closest person for almost a year, or two years? I don't know, I'm not good with calculations, but I know for sure that she will remain my closest for a long time. I feel that nothing could take away what we have, what the Sarah, Adam and I have. Not even if I call her gaywoman =D!
I was speaking to Adam last night, it was a mainly happy talk all through the hours, but there were bits where we couldn't help to feel sentimental about the things and people around us. There was one section where I was telling Adam how lonely nights are for me sometimes when I can't get to sleep. I used to feel lonely all the time at night, but recently I am either too tired to think before I sleep or simply because, I think of happy things when I sleep =D. But inevitably there will be nights that I cannot escape thinking about things that makes my heart shrink or makes my breathing deeper.
Then I said to Adam, I know when we will be living together, at nights when I feel how I felt last night, I could see myself creeping around the apartment and find my way in Sarah's bed, and then we will both be sleeping like babies =D.
I just went down to prepare boiled water for noodles. I don't usually eat before I swim but if my father catches me going to swimming, or going anywhere in fact, in an empty stomache, he wouldn't be a happy man.
It is because when I travel on an empty stomache, I throw up. Any moving vehicle will do it, and aeroplanes & boats/ferries are guaranteed.
I like the clean state my kitchen is in now. My mother has changed all the foil around the fire area; a few days ago the cockroach killing people came in and did something to the kitchen, I wasn't there to witness, but last night when I went downstairs to have a drink there weren't any cockroaches around =D. I was so happy then.
I will come back to this entry later, my noodles are ready and I need to get dressed, ohh.
Today will be good =D!
11:59PM
Helloooo my little chickens!
As predicted, today was so fun =D. Sam, Adam and I went swimming! Sarah you missed everything; there was a sense on incompleteness of the Furzedown Four without you. Next time we definitely go together =).
I got to Brixton rec first, and a few steps behind me was Sam, we got up to the gates and there was a notice there saying it's closed because something happened with the heating ... =(. When Adam humbly arrived we decided we should go to the Streatham pool ... the pool with nails and hair gathered at the bottom =/.
Streatham pool was the first pool I've been to so I remember it really clearly; Adam had his scuba diving lessons there and Sam had his swimming lessons there. Female changing rooms on a revamp so I had to go to a temporary room to change, you'll find out why this is relevant later.
At first I was super-scared of the deep end, it is 2m deep T_T. I am someone who likes to know I'm walking on solid ground; it took me years to get over the deep end at Balham pool, and that was 1.7m! But however, by the end of today's swimming, I swam to the deep end by myself even! Hoho!
Ahahaha so many crazy things happened at the pool:
Got a call from Sarah afterwards telling me she's not dead haha =D, she read my blog and knows I'm worried. So that call made my day ^^~!
Arrghhh on the bus to Sam's, I could not help feeling my hair and smelling how concentrated the chlorine is on it; it felt like dried grass! This is why the female changing rooms' unavailability is relevant! I don't give two shits about chlorine being all over my body but I do about my hair! Ever since being lazy and going swimming excessive amounts thus bleaching parts of my hair, I couldn't risk damaging my hair again T_T! When I got to Sam's first thing was whip out Seongjin's Korean shampoo & conditioner and stormed into Sam's bathroom =D.
Then afterwards .... we watched 'Ali G indahouse' ahahaha.
Have to get up extra early tomolo ... 8:45AM, for Sarah. The things I do for you...
♥ Joey
Previous entries:
My brother's 18th! - 2006-06-12
No more exams! - 2006-06-10
Two more exams left! - 2006-06-07
Game Maniac - 2006-06-04
Antipication of no exams. - 2006-06-02
More entries could be found here.
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