Lonely At Night
2006-06-01 / 1:28 a.m.


I was just sleeping, but I got up, and felt lonely suddenly, so I came on MSN to see who's there. There's almost always at least two people on MSN all the time, and even if the odd few who I don't talk to usually, perhaps talking to them will make this empty feeling go away.

Even if you have someone you can share your heart with, even if both your parents are still there, even if ... anything. Even if anything, you still feel lonely, right?
Is loneliness something that everyone has, even people who are very rich and has everything, even players who has all the girls and guys they want? They still get lonely, I suppose.

I don't think loneliness is a scale to measure how content someone is in life. Some people may think, the reason why people get lonely is because they have something missing in life. But then I wonder, even if people has everything in life ... the perfect job, perfect partner, perfect life ... then they still get lonely too? But what would they be lonely for?
And what am I lonely for right now? I could spend a whole night wide awake looking for something to be lonely for. I have all the fundamentals in life and even more than some people, and I can't seem to come up with anything that is missing... apart from the qualifications and a nice big house of course, but they will come in due time [hopefully], so they really aren't in the question. Even so, I don't think I can get lonely because I don't have a set of As anyway.

I was talking to someone on the phone about 40 minutes ago, and at the end of the 5 minutes, I just didn't want them to hang up. Although I know, even if they are still on the line it wouldn't make the loneliness go away - I still feel lonely, but perhaps when they are gone and I'm by myself in the bed, it's a whole new different level.

If you are reading this and hoping it may be the absense of you in my life that is making me lonely, then no it's not you; it hasn't been you for a long time. The person I have in mind that could be a catalyst for this sudden short-lived loneliness is someone who I'm talking to, and at a guess, does not read this any longer. Perhaps I couldn't say it to them because my MSN keeps logging me off and my messages cannot get through.

What a letdown.
A sunshine new layout but the immediate new post has to be so gloomy.
It's okay, because it's what blogging is about =).

Suddenly again, I don't feel so lonely anymore.



♥ Joey



Previous entries:

My brother's 18th! - 2006-06-12

No more exams! - 2006-06-10

Two more exams left! - 2006-06-07

Game Maniac - 2006-06-04

Antipication of no exams. - 2006-06-02



More entries could be found here.